Complementarianism may be an unfamiliar word to many people but the concept is not. Our Southern Baptist pastors and SBC leaders are in danger of eating a deadly fruit offered by Lifeway’s deceived Beth Moore as she recklessly apologizes for teaching complementarianism as a “doctrine of Man”[1] and while people like Karen Swallow Prior (Southern Baptist Theological Seminary professor) falsely states that complementarianism is a “20th century construct that’s outside traditional, historic Christianity.”[2] These women are marching to the drum of the liberal, left feminist, Kristin Du Mez, author of Jesus and John Wayne: How White Evangelicals Corrupted a Faith and Fractured a Nation.[3]They are precisely the living proof as to why complementarianism matters and why Scripture teaches that women are not to lead our churches (1 Timothy 2:12-15).
Complementarianism is the biblical teaching that God has created and designed men and women with equal value but different, complementary role assignments in the home and in the church.[4] Contrary to the male-dominated world, Jesus placed value on women and involved them in His ministry. The opposite view of this is called egalitarianism which is the belief that men and women are created with equal value but with equal role assignments in the home and church ignoring the plain reading of the biblical texts.
The question often is, “Does it really matter?” Yes! Here are three, compelling and deeply theological, reasons why complementarianism does matter:
1. It Reflects the Gospel of God – Eph. 5:22-33
2. It Esteems & Honors the Word of God – Titus 2:3-5
3. It Upholds the Authority of God – 1 Corinthians 11:2-16
First, the Gospel is to be reflected in our marriage roles and relationships as seen in Ephesians chapter 5. Verse 21 is often touted by egalitarians as the proof text for the mutual submission of a husband and wife. Surprisingly, it doesn’t take much effort in reading the book to see the natural flow for how believers are to engage one another (4:1-30, 5:1-4) and to mutually encourage and submit to each other (5:15-21). Then, Ephesians 5:22-33 moves into the specific relationship of a husband and wife with specific guidelines. The wife is to submit to her own husband (v.22). That word “submit” doesn’t mean as a child should obey a parent, but it is a voluntary, intellectual submission deferring to an authority—not ever forced.[5] Next, it becomes clear why this matters. Verse 23 tells us why, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is head of the church…Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” It is saying when wives submit to and respect their husbands and when husbands sacrificially love their wives and nurture them as Christ loves the church, it mirrors the gospel. It is specifically Christian and intentionally intended to be the gospel on display. It does not mean the woman is lesser than the man, nor inferior, less educated, nor incompetent. This Scripture actually elevates the care of the wife and protects her, while placing greater responsibility on the husband. For marriage to be analogous to the gospel is no convenient metaphor. It is divinely inspired. Therefore, we cannot say complementarianism is a new construct or that it doesn’t matter. When these roles are lived the way Scripture teaches, it shows the world what our relationship to Christ looks like. When we don’t do this, we blur, hide, disgrace, and confuse the Gospel to the world around us. This matters.
Second, the Word of God is either esteemed highly and honored by our lives (including role assignments) or it is blasphemed. Sound pretty brazen? That’s what the Scripture says. As a matter of fact, we are the ones who are brazen when we ignore these teachings. Titus 2 is written to give instruction to believers on how to live as Christians. It specifically instructs young women on their role assignments (vv.3-5): “to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the Word of God may not be (blasphemed or) reviled.” Typically, most people would be able to define those terms easily. However, since the 20th century, these words all of the sudden seem hard to understand and define when they no longer fit our narrative. We must, dear friends, be determined that we will honor the Word of God and trust His design in how we live—even when it goes against all the things our feminist culture has lied to us about. This passage truly is liberating when lived out as described—as all passages are. The Lord is good. He designed men to lead and love their wives, and He designed women to love and submit to their husbands. What we know from Titus is that if we don’t do these things, that our very disobedience to it blasphemes the Word of God. Again, this matters!
Finally, the authority of God is no small thing. It is upheld when men are properly in authority in the home and the church, otherwise it is disgraced. 1 Corinthians 11:2-16 instructs us that at the head of every wife is her husband, the head of the husband is Christ, and the head of Christ is God. Men are to be in authority in the church and home (1 Timothy 3:1-13, Eph. 5:22-33) and they are to be under the authority of Christ (v.3). The word “head” means “the one in supreme or pre-eminent status in order of authority.”[6] Contextually, the most plausible meaning is that of authority. Grudem did an extensive study of over 2,000 extrabiblical Greek uses of this term. It consistently means authority.[7]Authority is designed by God. Even Christ himself was under the authority of God and was obedient to God (even to death on the cross—Phil.2:8) though He was equal with God. That’s not heresy. That’s the Scripture. The Gospels are replete with Jesus saying He was doing what the Father told him to do. When a man is not in authority in the home and church as he should be, and not leading in that role, he disgraces the Lord. The same goes for women. When women are not under the authority of their husbands, they disgrace their husbands—ultimately disgracing and shaming the Lord—both acting like God’s authority doesn’t matter. This matters.
Clearly, how we live in our home and in the church represents so much more! How we live out the Gospel of God in marriage roles, how we honor the Word of God in marriage and home, and how we uphold the Authority of God in the home and church either reflects the beauty and majesty and graciousness of our God or completely discredits and dishonors His place of authority in our lives. These are God-inspired links to basic theological truths and that is no small thing! These are distinctly Christian and not merely an outdated tradition. This is complementarianism and this matters.
[1] https://www.washingtonpost.com/religion/2021/04/07/beth-moore-women-complementarianism/
[3] https://shenviapologetics.com/cowboy-christianity-a-short-review-of-du-mezs-jesus-and-john-wayne/
[4] Ge. 2:7, 18, 19; Eph. 5:22-33; 1 Tim. 2:9-12; Titus 2:3-5; 1 Cor. 11:2-16; 14:33-35; 1 Pet. 3:1-6.
[5] James Strong, Enhanced Strong’s Lexicon (Woodside Bible Fellowship, 1995).
[6] Johannes P. Louw and Eugene Albert Nida, Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament: Based on Semantic Domains (New York: United Bible Societies, 1996), 738.
[7] Andreas J. and Margaret Kostenberger, God’s Design for Man and Woman: A Biblical Theological Survey (Wheaton, Illinois: Crossway, 2014) 170.